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Feb. 13th, 2008 11:12 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
besubversiveSo. I know it seems like I'm always talking about new clothes. I really don't buy that much, and lately it has been out of necessity (read: dwindling wardrobe), and I seriously don't buy anything that's not at least 50% off the ticket price. I'm a Clearance Queen. And I don't spend more than $20 on any one thing. EVER. Shoes, coats, I don't care. It better be less than $20. Okay. Consumer guilt: purged.
Okay, so I bought a pair of jeans. GASP! Which brings the grand total of jeans in my possession up to a big ol'... one! I wear dresses. Skirts. I'd be happy to wear a dress every day for the rest of life, but I do recognize that there are situations that call for slightly more rugged and less crotch-accessible attire. However. Jeans on my body, pre-healthful habits, looked a bit ridiculous. Like I was a candied apple on a jean-covered stick--a bit top heavy. I'm still kinda built that way, but things have evened out enough for pants to actually suit me. And I have a butt, and you can tell now.
My ass, let me show you it. In jeans!
What else? Oh, V-Day! I'm probably going to wear a black dress or black skirt and tank with a sassy satiny cropped jacket. Also black. And then red patent shoes and lipstick to match. The lady is a vamp!
Also, Elliott is my Valentine this year. Here are some other things about Elliott:
Ten Top Trivia Tips about Elliott!
- Pound for pound, hamburgers cost more than Elliott.
- During severe windstorms, Elliott may sway several feet to either side!
- During the reign of Peter the Great, any Russian nobleman who chose to wear Elliott had to pay a special Elliott tax.
- Medieval knights put the skin of Elliott on their sword handles to improve the grip.
- If your ear itches, this means that someone is talking about Elliott!
- Devoid of his cells and proteins, Elliott has the same chemical makeup as sea water.
- A sixteenth century mathematician lost his nose in a duel over his love for Elliott, and wore a silver replacement for the rest of his life.
- Apples are covered with a thin layer of Elliott.
- Ostriches stick their heads in Elliott not to hide but to look for water!
- Antarctica is the only continent without Elliott!
I am not surprised about #9, because Elliott always has to pee. Just full of water all the time.
Shower and sleep, shower and sleeeeeeep!
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